birthday boy

[thedreamthief]

It's a quiet night, all things considered. Ronan wouldn't even call it a fucking party so much as more or less a typical night at Hywel, albeit one where they're all miraculously there at the same time. Blue's even stayed, grinning along with Noah as they brought in the birthday pie -- Noah had insisted on a cake but apparently Blue has some friend who makes a mean pecan pie -- and then curling herself up on the couch next to Adam.

They'd turned on the TV but hand't really watching much of it, spending most of the time talking as Ronan nursed a beer or two and Adam tried not to acknowledge the reason behind the whole evening.

Not that they really let him forget it. Especially not Noah.

It's well past midnight when Adam starts to drift. The TV's still on and Noah and Blue are in a heated discussion about the evolution of alternative rock when Ronan reaches over to curl his hand lightly around Adam's wrist.

"Alright, losers, me and birthday boy are heading to bed," he says, the arch of his eyebrow brooking no argument.

Noah looks between the two of them, his grin widening and Blue only rolls her eyes, but neither of them try to stop him. Ronan ignores any further comment from both of them, tipping his head back to finish off his beer before setting the empty bottle on the table and dragging Adam to his feet.

"No argument from you either," he adds, his voice low and for Adam only as he steers him toward the bedroom.

Comments

[thedreamthief]

Ronan is thorough, taking his time with licking Adam clean, enjoying the tang of salt on his tongue, the tang of Adam before slowly kissing his way upward over the flat plane of Adam's quivering stomach.

He glance up at Adam's quiet beckoning and then crawls over, draping himself over Adam's prone form as their lips meet. It's a cool touch compared to the heat of Adam's body, sweet compared to the salty, and Ronan lets out a soft, content sigh as he settles.

"Next time I clean you, I want it to be my own come," he says with an almost playful sort of smirk, his nose bumping Adam's. "From between your thighs."

[incognoscibilis]

He lets Ronan settle, curling against him in a way that's become familiar, that lets them sleep. Maybe they will close their eyes and drift off after this, maybe not until later. It doesn't matter too much; the whole night stretches out in front of them as if it might last forever. As if it belongs to them alone.

Listening to Ronan's fantasy makes his skin warm, imagining Ronan, slick against and around him, between his legs. Something about it sounds so rough and instinctive that he can't help nodding along with the idea.

"You planning to do that tonight or wait until morning?"

[thedreamthief]

Ronan replies only with a low, thoughtful hum before giving a single-shouldered shrug. "Might have to surprise you," he says, grinning faintly as he slides his hand up Adam's side and then down again, memorizing every bump and dip of his ribs.

The words brush up against something Ronan hasn't admitted out loud himself, some of the darker things he's thought of, in dreams both asleep and waking. It might be too many revelations for one night though, might be something that crosses too far over a line Adam's only just begun to lower.

"I wouldn't," he clarifies, nervous even now. "Not without you knowing, okay?"

[incognoscibilis]

Lazily, Adam reaches up to trace the shape of Ronan's face, his cheekbone, jaw, skull. "I trust you," he says again. Their trust is like spider silk, impossibly strong and impossibly fragile, gossamer and beautiful.

"What are you thinking right now?" He can see the shadow flickering over Ronan's face and he knows it well enough to be curious.

[thedreamthief]

Adam's touch is a slow brush that still manages to warm Ronan to his core, fingers grazing along his jaw and cheekbone, up to the shorn hair of his skull.

He lets out a breath, still worried of the words he's about to say, the way Adam might take them.

Swallowing, he keeps his eyes locked on Adam's, watching for even the tiniest tremor of unease as he says, "I've thought about starting when you're still sleeping. Fingering you open and slipping inside. The other way, too. Waking up with you already inside me or your mouth on me."

[incognoscibilis]

He knows when Ronan asks it that it's not something Adam can give in any format. Even as Ronan talks about wanting it from Adam, it feels too much like a violation. They've both been ripped from too fragile sleep by waking nightmares.

"Wake me with kisses," Adam says instead. "Until I can't think of anything but you. I want to wake up to you making me hard for you."

[thedreamthief]

Adam doesn't recoil or so much as go tense in Ronan's arms. It isn't a refusal so much as an alteration and Ronan lets out a breath, blood warming as he nods and leans in close, is breath against Adam's lips.

"Along the back of your neck," he whispers, skating his fingers down Adam's bare side. "Your shoulders, the top of your spine." He presses a kiss then, just a lingering press of lips before he adds, "I won't touch you until I know you're awake and with me. And you can always tell me to stop."

[incognoscibilis]

Adam nods and closes his eyes, enjoying the way it lets him concentrate on Ronan's fingers, his kisses. "You too," he says. "I'll never want to do something that you can't."

Ronan knows that, he thinks, but they've both been denied the permission to just tell someone no without consequence. Being given and being able to give that, instead, feels like a gift too.

"I love you," he says. "And...I'm happy, Ronan."

[thedreamthief]

Ronan's begun to lose track of the number of times Adam's said those words and still every single instance feels like a revelation. His smile is slow, but immediate, the words like a caress as he leans in again for another kiss, slower this time, deeper, as his hand curls warm over Adam's side and he holds him close.

A year ago, he was only dreaming of this. He hasn't brought this to life no matter what he feared at the start. Adam loves him on his own even if Ronan will never understand how or why. Adam loves him and it's better than any fucking dream he's ever had.

"Me, too," he says, still smiling as he presses on last light kiss to the bow of Adam's lips. "Happy birthday."

[incognoscibilis]

It's the first time that Adam's had a really happy birthday and, as firsts go, he thinks it's pretty great. Adam smiles and bumps his forehead very gently against Ronan's and then kisses him again, just for the joy of being able to. There's a softness in Ronan's face that makes Adam want to keep touching it, to enjoy his happiness too, before the inevitable scowl returns.

"I'm going to sleep like the dead tonight," he says, because he knows his body is exhausted and overwhelmed. "And you're going to wake me up with kisses–if you want."

He smiles. "Thank you."

[thedreamthief]

Adam kisses him again, a soft, lingering touch of lips to lips that has whatever remaining tension in Ronan's shoulder melting away. He keeps his eyes on Adam and Adam settles back, knowing he'll likely not manage sleep for a few more hours, but he can pretend.

"I definitely want," Ronan assures him, his voice low. "Even if it's not much of a surprise if you're expecting it."

That's hardly the point though and they both know it. Ronan leans over one last time, kissing just the corner of Adam's lips and whispering a quiet, "Goodnight."